50 Versions of the F word

Whenever I’m watching TV or hovering over an online game my son is playing, I notice how the F word gets sanitized with frick , freaking, frock, or some other variation of the word.

While I state my own fair share of expletives from time to time, I know it’s still disrespectful to announce the word “fuck”. It brings back to mind looks of horror and gasps from when my mom heard me say it. I know it’s just a word-no better or worse than saying idiot or stupid, but it’s still not a word I want my kids using as verbs or adjectives. Honestly, the dictionary has a lot more descriptive words I prefer they learn instead of resorting to some language everyone else uses when pissed off.

So my kids try to get away with saying frick or Fook or something. And today I was feeling annoyed at how much I hear it. It could be any word, like “whatever” or “I know, right?”

The redundancy was exhausting my nervous system.

I turned to my son and said that from now on, if I hear that word or any version of it, expect to run around the yard 3x. He blurted out, “What the Frick?”

I said, “looks like you want to run.” He got upset and continued complaining, using F word versions of all kinds until he was up to 12 laps. At this point, his sisters and I were laughing. That’ll learn him, I guess.

I wasn’t trying to be wise, but I realized I killed two birds with one stone. Not only am I attacking his redundant word usage, but I also got him to exercise, something he’s not overly fond of.

Not sure if he’ll give up his F word variety show, but at least I tried. Parenting these days takes way more creativity. When I was a kid, I got a bar of soap to the mouth. Of course, I don’t agree with that at all but parents never knew how easy they had it.

Anyway, I got tired just watching him run 12 laps so hopefully it taught him something. Next attempt will be to make him memorize words from the dictionary. Haha.


2 thoughts on “50 Versions of the F word

  1. Ben says:

    It’s a good lesson for your son to learn and exercise is always good too.

    My favorite F-word substitute (if you can have such a thing) is when I watched a movie on TV that was heavily edited and instead of them saying “God-D*** Mother F…ā€¦” they said “Gosh Darned Melon Farmer.” It was funny because it sounded absurd and also because it matched up almost perfectly to the mouth movements of the actor saying the original naughty words. šŸ™‚

    Liked by 1 person

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