A Waste of, I mean a wrinkle in time

This weekend we decided to rent “A Wrinkle in Time”. I’ve never read the book and so I can’t comment on the story from that perspective. But I can comment on the movie and it’s story.

I honestly can’t believe Chris Pine decided to act in this film. If you’ve seen Wonder Woman, then you know Chris Pine. Swoon. Except not in this movie. He was all hairy and straggly.

Little trivia… Did you know his Dad played in Chips? His name is Robert Pine. I just dated my damn self.

And I thought Chris looked an awful lot like his daddio in this movie. Besides that, Oprah, Reese Witherspoon, and Mindy Kahling played “the misses”, which were sort of like fairy God mothers who transported the kids around to different universes. The kids were looking for their father, played by Chris Pine, who goes missing while trying to “touch hands with the universe”.

The story was all over the place and confusing. It starts out ok with the main character, Meg trying to make sense of her dad being gone for the last 4 years. Like most kids movies, it has the typical bullies and the kid who falls for her. And then it gets bizarre with Reese Witherspoon dropping by unannounced. The family doesn’t seem all that shocked when she arrives looking like she wrapped herself from head to toe in toilet paper and making small talk with her adoptive brother, who apparently had talked to her before. The entire storyline is weird like this and you find yourself filling in the blanks later, but still perplexed.

The acting is pretty weird and unconvincing. The special effects were almost too much. And the storyline was cheesy mixed with Oprah-like quotes throughout. If that wasn’t enough, I felt like I spent most of the movie looking up Oprah’s nose. Also her makeup was just distracting. I found myself staring at her eyebrows trying to figure out if it was tinfoil or makeup. Just weird.

I can’t believe I sat through the entire thing. My husband fell asleep. When he got up, he asked if I watched the entire thing and I responded, “Yeah I did. I kept waiting for it to get better, but it never did.”

What is much more entertaining is reading the movie reviews, which is what I should’ve done before renting this dreadful flick. I think this guy on Rotten Tomatoes summed it up pretty well:

I feel as though this film is some sort of punishment for not having read the book as a child. Dreadful. Absolutely dreadful.